Krista Law:: Anxiety + Depression

At our last meeting, fan-favorite Krista Law, LMHC, spoke about anxiety and depression. Krista is a local therapist who herself struggled with postpartum depression and invites us all to look at our own tendencies without fear or shame. She's always refreshingly honest, understanding, and wise when addressing such a sensitive topic. And FUNNY. I could listen to her all day, and always wish I could invite her over for dinner so we could become best friends, BUT something stops me...probably the threat of a restraining order.

Click HERE for the recording of Krista's talk. And for those of you joining us from work and can't listen, a summary is included below. Enjoy!

Anxiety:

• "I need full control. If I don't do it, no one will."
• Feels tight, fast, wound, spinning. It appears as perfectionism and restlessness. 
• This is when you feel like the only one to govern everything on your plate.

Depression: 

• "I have no control." 
• Slow, loose, non-commital, lack of energy, trouble sleeping/weird sleeping schedule
• Gloom, lack of pleasure and don't enjoy things you used to

How does this happen?

A: You were in a family with no control, you had to care for yourself, were not remembered or seen.

A presence of anxiety= an absence of care.

D: Presence of criticism, nothing's good enough so you resign, constant critique. 

Vacillating between the two looks like being ready for perfection, only to fall short and resign to "it's not going to work."

This can happen daily.

But.

What was the intent for us?

See Genesis 1,2, & 3. 

//We've been given a charge, an authority to engage in our lives. We have SOME control.

//BUT there was a tree we couldn't touch...so there's a LIMIT. Let some things go.

Look at Newton's Law of Motion: for every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction.

...when we swing to one extreme, we are typically drawn to someone living the other extreme to achieve balance in our relationships. How does this look in our lives?

...your children are trying to create this balance, too + respond accordingly. Watch for their behaviors changing with your needs/moods as they try to care for you OR lean back as you anxiously hover.

SO.

//You have a choice.

//You need support. Someone to hear, understand and encourage.

//You need to surrender. To goodness, to "God with you and God for you." 

The benefit of doing this?

A: When you're not in full control, someone wants to (and will) help.

D: You see that you are good and have goodness in you and people are there for you in that. 

Discussion Questions/Things to Ponder:

1. Where do you find yourself most often in regards to your family? Anxious? Depressed?
2. Can you name one thing that you could give up trying to control?
3. Can you name one thing that you will make an effort to begin taking responsibility for?
4. What are some obstacles to believing that God is ultimately in control? What are some obstacles to believing that you have some control?
5. After you give something up (either anxiety/control or depression/lack of control) there will be a space--will you fill it with kindness and self-care? How so? Specifically? No, really, write down the ways you will start introducing care for yourself!

Resources: 
The Healing Path by Dan Allender
Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow
Undoing Depression by Richard O'Connor
I Love You Rituals by Becky Bailey

Referrals:
Northwest Family Life
Psychology Today
NWAPS

Krista Law, MA, LMHC

Individual & Couples Counseling

www.kristalaw.com

206.866.5083

www.3therapistswalkintoablog.com