Ashley Rodriguez::Motherhood Tips

At our last meeting, we had the pleasure of hearing from Ashley Rodriguez, author of Date Night In. Ashley shared humble wisdom with us, offering encouragement she missed believing when her kids were tiny. Read through the recap and/or listen to her talk while taking in the pointers we all need to be reminded of in this season.

Click HERE for the recording of Ashley's talk.

Enjoy!

It's not possible to "savor every moment..."

• Release the shame and guilt you may feel when you hear those words.
• BUT, you do lose some perspective as they get older and find yourself missing the baby days.
• Take pictures and videos. You'll want to see those tiny kiddos again!
• Smell their heads
• Journal the mundane details

Be a better boss...

• That "boss" is us, our inner critic/negative inner voice that tells us "look at all you haven't done..."
• Applaud yourself for the smallest thing. For example, celebrate getting out of bed or making a good cup of coffee. Those small, everyday things become big things and change your critic over time. Encouragement goes a long way.
• Beware: that negative voice can translate over to our kids. Suddenly, we're criticizing the outcome of their efforts rather than praising the effort. Appreciate their action and heart behind them.

Take care of yourself...

• Taking care of yourself is the opposite of selfish when you're taking care of little people
• Doing replenishing things helps us care better for them. Journal, walk, yoga, spa, nap...squeeze those things in that fill you up and help you breathe. And don't feel bad about it.

Don't forget your person/partner...

• We're all guilty of waiting for a "different season" to date again. Do it now.
• Plan one night per week where you put the kids to bed, then eat dinner just the two of you. 
• It feels strange at first, like you're admitting defeat (we can't even go out anymore?). But you get used to it and look forward to it. The more you're with each other, the more you want to be.
• When marriage feels yucky, so does everything else. Invest.

Motherhood looks different for everyone...

• It's so vulnerable, taking care of these little people, that we want validation. It's normal. We try so hard to be the mom we "should" be or are "supposed" to be. 
• Let YOU be YOU. Then motherhood makes more sense. 
• Pretty soon, you recognize your strengths and apologize often when you fall short (i.e. great food on the table--a strength--might mean a messy kitchen most of the time. Sorry.).

Discussion Questions

• Is motherhood what you expected? How is it different than what you expected?
• What lies of inadequacy are you telling yourself?
• How do you and your partner stay connected during these busy days?