Carenet - Talking to kids about sexuality and healthy relationships

Catching up on MOPS speaker recaps. No audio to share from Carenet's speaker, but here are some notes to recap some of the wisdom shared:

While it can be awkward to talk openly to our kids, being the first word on the subject by doing so can have significant advantages. If we send the message to our kids that "we" as parents know about the subject, they won't just assume we don't and get information from each other, the internet, etc. Real information = better outcomes! 

Important steps to consider when broaching the topic:
1. Evaluate your frame of reference
2. Clarify your convictions
3. Teach what God says about sex
4. Challange your children to have a standard
5. Create a home that provides love, security & physical affection for your children

Tone & attitude are just as important as your words:
-Don't be the parent that is freaking out
-Don't pass on any "hang-ups" about sex
-Don't make sex weird or secretive
-Don't tell "tall tales" (stork, magic, etc)
-Don't lecture
-Don't plan one big talk
-Don't pass this on to someone else
-Don't think that only dads talk to sons
-KISS: Keep It Super Simple

Some breakdowns of when/what to talk to with our kids at certain ages:
Babies
Start when they're babies by naming body parts with them

Age 2-3
Introduce boundaries - ex: "there are times and places to be naked"
Privacy & body safety. Keep it simple by talking about things like closing door for privacy

Age 3-5
Kids are curious - peeping, exploring, playing dr, etc are healthy & normal ways of expressing this curiosity.
Teach about it not being approriate to touch others' private parts or for anyone else to touch yours

Age 4+
Talking with kids about how all living things produce can be a good frame of reference (dogs have babies, humans have babies, etc)
Making babies is for adults, not kids
Teach kids basic biology

Age 5-10 (+ other ages)
Limit screens & online time
Supervise internet use
Use filters
Keep internet use & computer in public areas
Talk about uncomfortable pictures that your kids may see online.

References suggested:
Books - Sex:
3-5 yrs - The Story of Me
5-8 yrs - Before I was Born
8-11 yrs - What's the Big Deal?
11-14 yrs - Facing the Facts
Parents -
How and When to Tell Your Kids About Sex
Mom, Dad...What's Sex?
How Babies are Made

Books - Body Safety:
Body Safety Education
God Made All of Me
Some Secrets Should Never be Kept
No Means No!
I Said No!

Books - Secrets, Separation Feelings, Anxiety:
Do You Have a Secret?
You Weren't With Me
Once I was Very Very Scared
A Terrible Thing Happened

Books - Pornography:
Good Pictures, Bad Pictures
Good Pictures, Bad Pictures Jr.

Books - Puberty:
Guy Stuff: the Body Book for Boys
Celebrate Your Body (and It's Changes, Too!): The Ultimate Puberty Book for Girls

Other Resources:
Risen Motherhood Podcast
Relatable Podcast (Allie Beth Stucky)
FamilyLife Today Website & Podcast
Article - Tim Challes: How to Teach Your Kids About Sex
Article - Got Questions: How Should a Christian View Sex Education?